Are You Sure?

Are You Sure?, a photo by rhubs knit on Flickr.


I turned this photo into a poster that I love to use to show the two parts of myself & to remind myself to have have confidence from within.

Love At First Sight! Happy Valentine's Day to all my Flickr friends!

Love At First Sight! Happy Valentine's Day to all my Flickr friends!, a photo by rhubs knit on Flickr.

Postcard #1 Well this week I was giving myself a hard time for breaking down & adopting 2 girls one of which is Babette with her pup Bibi (on the left) as I have been good since August of 2011 the longest stretch of not adding a single doll & in fact had rehomed 2 momoko girls I loved a lot to a dear friend in Australia, Worry has overtaken me this past week so explaining why I broke from my resolve not to bring anymore girls into my home is in order. You see Goldie on the right & I had been missing Amelia for over 6 months now, (one of 3 traveling Blythes also done by Gbaby like Babette), since Amelia came to visit us at the end of June through the 4th of July right after I had been released from the hospital after dying & coming back from pneumonia. Feeling terrible & weak I took Goldie & Amelia out & about & watched how Goldie came to life in a new way with one of Gbaby's girls to play off of. Now I know I could still win Amelia, Goldie's best friend ever & would love to have Amelia come live with us too, but when I saw Babette I knew she could bring Goldie great pleasure as well as me & that Amelia would likely remain a distant friend (though I still wish she could come here as well...) so here Babette is & just in time for Valentines Day when Goldie would so need to fall in love again. Goldie is smitten & it was love at first site for the two of us with Babette & Bibi so I am trying to forgive myself for spending almost 2 months of my fixed income & not put pressure on myself to immediately adopt out the many takara rbls that I will one day send out on their own adventures when the time is right.. There is still a girl coming who will be another girl's special friend from a caring flickr friend that I finally met at BlytheCon2011 who gave me the biggest hugs with tears after knowing I barely made it to the event. I am hoping that I will make it to BlytheCon 2012, but money lately seems to be a question knowing I will probably now never work full time again. I know as time passes & I don't add anyone else I will feel better & I also know I would have regretted passing up Babette & the coming Po. Besides who really knows what the future will bring.
Another thing, I had also planned to send out some Valentine cards to some very dear flickr blythe friends earlier this week who also became very important to me during the summer right after being so ill, but failed at that too & so the affection these 2 show gazing at each other for the first time provided me with at least a photo card for Valentine's Day. Maybe I will send out real belated V day postcards of this photo, but this will be good enough I think... I need to let go of the worry about money & now truly just enjoy the girls I have! Slowly I will let go of some of my other girls, but no rush. I just need to forgive myself & enjoy 2 new girls who bring me a special joy after a time that was so difficult. I hope this is not too personal, forgive me if it is... & know that in the future I will do better & in fact get cards off & special swaps off once again giving back to all those who have given me so much & as I get stronger I will stop being such a hermit. :)